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Entertainment, Humor

Why You Shouldn’t Buy a Hydro Flask

Really, don’t buy one.

Walking down the hall, you’ll see countless bandwagoning high schoolers with AirPods in their ears, a PopSocket on their iPhone, and of course you cannot forget about their dented Hydro Flask. Although I don’t actually have one myself, I managed to come up with four terrible reasons to not waste your money on a giant container made of steel.

  1. They are really heavy and big.

A Hydro Flask might seem like the perfect container to hold your water in, right? Well, no. Why would you buy a water bottle that feels like you’re lugging around a brick everywhere? I mean, it’s not even like they would fit in your backpack. They’re heavy and bulky. I’m sure you’d literally fracture your spine if you somehow fit it into your backpack and carried it on your back.

  1. They’re expensive.

Why buy a $59.95 water bottle when you can easily get a $10 one from WalMart? Why are Hydro Flasks so expensive anyways? I understand that they can keep water cold, but can’t you find a piece of steel in a junkyard?

  1. They dent easily.

Once this girl in a hallway dropped her Hydro Flask two feet from the ground, and I swear it dented. Sure it gives “character”, but it also makes it look really ugly. Plus, shouldn’t something that costs $60 be un-dentable?

  1. They’re just for the hype.

Whether or not you buy a Hydro Flask all depends if you want to jump on the “Basic Bandwagon”. Hydro Flasks are just cool looking water bottles that literally everyone has- besides me. I’m sure you can put stickers on any water bottle. So sure, buy a Hydro Flask for the hype.

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